Conflicts happen when you least expect them. After all, life is just like an electro cardiogram - once you are fully realized on all 3 sides of life (health, wealth and love/ relationships) the two possible ways it can go are either to stagnate (i.e. to stay the same for an random amount of time) or to go down. When it goes down…, well, we’ve all been there, you know!
Conflicts and fights with your housemates are some of the most stressful experiences you can have as a student and they should be avoided at when possible. Not only because you live with them every single day - swelling conflicts and unresolved issues may affect your long-term relationship with each other and can even break friendships.
There are 3 golden rules to consider when you try to get out of a nasty situation or seek to solve a conflict in a shared student house:
Rule number 1
Express your point of view in a calm manner and show understanding with your opponent's view. Don’t rush into making one-sided decisions or interrupt the other with a comment or by cutting their lines. In any conflict usually both parties have their part of truth and mindless fghting without a minimum of mutual respect will make the situation only worse. Instead, try to slow down your tone and your pitch, your breathing and you will see that by doing these small adjustments everything will become a bit clearer out of a sudden.
Rule number 2
Try to be a bit more relaxed and open to criticism. What I mean by that is to try and let things go more easily on your part. That will not make you a weaker person, or one with a lesser attitude, quite the contrary. The one who has the ability to easily solve conflicts is the stronger person.
Rule number 3
Don’t worry - everything is going to be alright in the end! Trust us when we’re telling you that there are worse things happening in the world right now than having a dispute with your housemates about dirty dishes or your missing yogurt that miraculously disappeared from the fridge. A fight between friends in nothing compared to the real conflicts on planet Earth. We know you are a valuable person and your rapport to the Universe matters, but "overdoing" when having a go at someone will not bring you any benefits. So relax, and try to realize that everything is going to be just fine after a couple of days, weeks or months.
Oh and I almost forgot that I wanted to share with you this amazing quote by
The Dalai Lama XIV:
“ If there is no solution to the problem then don't waste time worrying about it. If there is a solution to the problem then don't waste time worrying about it. ”